Bhagavad Get me out of here

Bhagavad Get Me Out of Here

This last week was one of the hardest and possibly worst weeks of my semester. Nothing necessarily bad happened, but I'll get back to that later. This week's reading for the Bhagavad Gita was a very interesting one when I thought about it in respect to my Catholic faith. One of the most interesting things that Krishna told Arjuna that one of the best ways to practice yoga was to think about who Krishna was. That sounds an awfully similar to something that I was taught to do in my Christian faith. Many times I've sat down and pondered who God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit were and are. This leads me to a deeper understanding in my faith and brings me closer to my Lord. 

Another interesting part of the Bhagavad Gita that we both read and discussed in great detail was the idea that one will reach eternal joy by abandoning our senses. Hunter brought of the point that it seemed like this was not a selfless act, like foregoing one bonus for a bigger bonus later. However, I think that it is not this simple. I think that this reflects a Christian teaching that says that everything we do should be a way that we are glorifying God or some trait about Him. Through this, we have to detach ourselves from our senses, which will lead us into sins of gluttony and others, and think about our overall goal of reaching salvation. From this perspective, I think that it is very similar to what Christians are called to do in their faith, much as Hindus are called to do in theirs.

This week's in-class practice was a mixed experience. Tuesday, all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball while simultaneously studying, sleeping, and crying. I had had a giant Biblical Heritage midterm due that day, a Psychopathology exam that day, and a Psych Stats test the next day. For those of you that do not know, psych stats is just about the single hardest class that a psychology major has to take. This class is hard not only because of the hard material, but also because the professor is well into his 80s and becoming more senile by the minute. Many times he will ask us why the example he started on the board was not working or tell us the same stories multiple classes in a row verbatim. I digress. I was stressed out of my mind for this test and everything else I had to do, so I didn't feel like I had time for yoga. After the practice on Tuesday, however, it did help a ton. Thursday's practice was warmly welcomed because I had finished all of my exams and whatnot, so I was more than ready for a yoga session where I did not have to worry about anything. Finally, one thing that was almost a rude awakening was that my right split was basically flat, but it was nowhere close to being aligned correctly for yoga. For gymnastics and ballet, it was not considered that large of a deal if the hips were not squared. In yoga, this could not be more wrong. Needless to say, I now have something I can practice on. 

The out of class practice was also a challenge. Because I felt like I had no time, I was not able to practice yoga until after my exams had ended. The only exception to this was pranayama. I have had anxiety problems for a very long time in addition to having very large reactions to basically anything. Also, I was known to occasionally fall into a small spurt of depression or feel like I was on top of the world. Throughout the course of last week, I had four anxiety attacks. I had two Sunday, one Tuesday, and one Wednesday. This made me realize that it was time to talk to my doctor. The end result is that I suffer from bipolar II disorder with anxiety tendencies. I have been put on two mood stabilizers and an emergency medication for anxiety attacks. This could not be more helpful. I feel more leveled and even now, and my thoughts are not racing through my head all the time. The only thing that mildly helped through my anxiety attacks this last week was controlled breathing. Usually, with my attacks, it is just a waiting game until it's over. This, however, was how I was kept up until six in the morning the morning of my psych stats exam. I had a cover for my class on Tuesday, but then picked up someone else's class Wednesday and my own on Thursday. It felt so wonderful coming back to them and being able to teach unrestricted with no boot. Once everything slowed down, I was able to actually enjoy my practice of yoga, which was a wonderful feeling.

Until next time, my fellow yogis and yoginins,

Namasté,

Upward-facing Bear